True experience

Richard_FL · #11 03-08-2006, 11:57 AM

Very funny stuff. They come buy my place of work and will start to pull out their junk while we have customers in the lobby! Most of them are about my age and don't seem to understand why I throw them out faster than they can say "Just for to day this will only cost you".

For some strange reason they don't come around to many homes in my area. Guess to many people have guns in my neck of the woods

.

As far as the phone calls go my borther used to drag out the calls to the very end and then right before they would sign them up he would ask if he had to be 18. Its amazing how long those guys will stay on the line if they think they will get a sale.

Whiskers · #12 03-08-2006, 01:38 PM

I had a fellow pester me for about 4 days in a row once, I was a third shifter and had a sign on the door saying 3rd shifter, day sleeper, please do not disturb. (wife was a first shifter). don't know what he was selling, didn't give him a chance, just told him I wasn't interested, day 2 same thing, day 3 to say the least just a tad !@#$% off and asked him if he could read, fourth day wasn't his day. I heard the knock on the door, peeked out the window and couldn't believe my eyes, there was two of em, him from the previos day and a buddy. I procedded to the door in my shorts opened the door and told him I would be right back, I came back with a Remington XP 100 (bolt action pistol with a 14" barrel chambered in 35 caliber with a scope)) told him I wasn't responsible for Mr. Remington's actions if he didn't like what he heard. There was a cloud of smoke and a bad odor where they wuz standin, never seen em again. True story.

Ron Davidson · #13 03-08-2006, 02:44 PM

I had several salespeople at the door since I moved to the big city. I have a video phone on my door that when you ring the door bell the camera comes on and shows a video on the monitor inside. It also has an intercom since I can't see who is there I just ask who it is. Well one salesman was selling magazines. I tried to explain to him that magazines did me little good. Except WCI of course I'm not that crazy. Anyway to make a long story short he wouldn't take no for an answer. This video phone also has it's own phone and several handy little buttons. One takes a picture and another blast a siren. So I just pushed the buttons and told him I had a picture of his ugly mug and was calling police. He moved out of the neighborhood real fast. I hope the siren broke his eardrums.

ElWoodTroll · #14 03-08-2006, 03:34 PM

Great solutions all. If Ron added flashing lights that would be my hands down favorite.
I greet unwanted visitors in my Jehova's witness garb

Canopener · #15 03-08-2006, 04:08 PM

I used to haul fuel to a ranch just south of the Grand Canyon, it was about 15 miles down a dirt road so they didn't get salesmen just pesky tourists. They had a big sign "Trespassers wil be Experimented On", with an alien picture. They claimed it did the trick.
When telemarketers call and ask how I am doing, I like to reply in a very flat voice, "I am in the middle of a fight with my wife". That usually ends that call. Cracks my wife up.
Jim

whitecree · #16 03-08-2006, 04:47 PM

I live in a very quiet, out of the way rural setting. No door to door idiots - except Jehovah's, and I tell them I'm a devil worshipper. They go away pretty quick.

Telemarketers I am very rude to.

Funny, hardly any call me any more...

BobD · #17 03-08-2006, 04:51 PM

I handles them in a very similar way WC. I dressed all in black (all my leftovers from my Goth days). Turned up my Nine Inch Nails CD and answered the door. I was as nice as can be and invited them in. About that time, my all black cat scampered past...

They haven't been back sense <grin>

Bob

rick-in-seattle · #18 03-08-2006, 05:01 PM

This is a true story; my brother had an odd mother-in-law who would show up early in the morning trying to catch him coming out of the shower.

After several weeks of this, my brother answered the door with only his towel (as usual) except this time he dropped it as he opend the door.

Standing there instead of his fruitcake mother-in-law were two middle-aged Jehovah's Witness ladies. I don't know who was more embarassed, but neither of the ladies could look my brother in the eye, but they were both looking.

Ron Davidson · #19 03-08-2006, 05:34 PM

I don't know how many know who Bill Engvall is but he is a country comedian. His solution for sleeping late and getting rid of salesman is to make a chalk outline of a body like a crime scene and even put some ketchup and religous or pamplets lying around. You might also add some discharged shotgun shells.

Kenny_S · #20 03-08-2006, 07:05 PM

Thank you thank you thank you. Some neat ideas. I like Dave's 2 x6 with a tomstone. The pistol idea has enter my head many times. Maybe with just a primer in the shell, Still loud enough but no harm. Nah, I don't like cleaning up crap either. Be my dang luck, the dude would die pf a heart attack.

Thank you all very much. It has been a hoot.

Ah Lori, should we hear your R rated way?