Ever had one of
those days? Well, for the brave of heart - and those who want a good chuckle - read on.
Up, as usual, about 6 ayem to get the coffee going. I found this to be one of the secrets to a long happy marriage. Be the first up to make the coffee!
So, I wander into the kitchen, dump the grounds out in the sink (I use a nylon basket) rinse the pot, plop it into place, switch on and
then notice I dumped the grounds on a pile of clean dishes that my daughter left to drain & dry in the sink.
So, I wash the dishes, rack them up in the proper drainer, go to open the back door to let the 3 stooges (my cats) in. The door is frozen shut. Well, hey, I have a butane torch, so maybe a bit of heat on the handle will thaw the workings enough? Give'er a try!
Did you know that most common exterior doorsets are made with plastic and nylon parts? But at least the 3 stooges got in. Oh well, just use a kitchen chair to block the door closed.
Look out the front window and (sigh) it snowed last night. Again. And the plow - for a change - came by early and naturally plugged the end of the driveway up.
Get dressed, go out, start shovelling. Of course, the shovel had fallen over and was now frozen to the ground, and covered in 3 inches of slushy, frozen snow. Brilliant idea #2 - I have an axe!
Seveal minutes of chopping later, the shovel is freed from the ground, the axe now has a nasty chip knocked out of the blade to match the chip knocked off the edge of the doorstep.
And the shovel handle is now in two pieces.
So, dig out emergency shovel - a small spade-like thing - from back of van - and try to at least clear a path wide enough to get the van out. I can pick up a new snow-pushing shovel later today and finish things off.
Almost an hour later, I stagger back inside, shed my outer layers and step on stooge#2's tail. Idiot cat! That'll teach'er to be so snoopy!
Go upstairs to pour wife's first coffee and ...
The maker wasn't plugged in, no fresh grounds in basket and no water in reservoir. Knew I missed something earlier.
Get coffee going, wake wife up, do the usual shuck and jive routine to appease her while waiting for the inexcusably late coffee to be ready. Another secret to a long marriage, instantly be ready to cringe and say "yes'm".
Time for work (driving daycare kids to & from daycare) go out to van and proceed to scrape windows and brush snow off. Snow scraper's are just cheap plastic. Snap! (big sigh) Finish the job with dog's old food dish after kicking it (rather savagely) free of encrusting ice.
Yank van door open, take one step inside and slide under the van, smacking shin bones rather smartly and twisting knee slightly. Grumbling, I climb back up, and crawl into van.
Of course, I left the keys inside the house...
On the road, peering out from between bars and layers of ice/snow. Interior defroster roaring merrily, and the chances of my hearing the cell phone ringing are pretty much nil. So I didn't hear about how one of my kids was to be picked up at a different address. So I wasted fifteen minutes going to the wrong address and waiting outside for the kid to show. (sigh)
All kids loaded up, and off to the daycare we go, hi ho hi ho!
One of'em has the flu.
Some of you with kids/grandkids must recall what flu is like on a little kid's stomach? And when one erupts, this generally causes a chain reaction...
Smelling - no,
reeking - of various regurgitated breakfasts, I manage to get the kids offloaded, check with the boss, and drive the one flu-struck kid home again.
Now, with great joy [sarcasm, here] I have the dubious pleasure of cleaning the van out.
So, how was your day?