[Shimmy]

You know what they say."If you don't get old you die young."

[Lynn O. Doughty]

Ok Fellas......I'm going to tell you the secret of why I'll always feel great even though I too may have a list of ailments. But, whatever you do, don't tell my wife I told you this!

When I was a much younger man, say 20, my window of reference for the fairer sex was about 20 years. I wouldn't look at a female younger than 18 nor older than 35-36. When I turned 40 that window had widened quite a bit to include the ages of 18 to about 45. Now that I'm 64 that window has really spread out from 18 to, dare I say it....64? I even catch myself casting an appreciative glance at some even older than that. Now, when I think that by the time I reach 75 ...WOW! That will be some window of reference. My daily trips to WalMart will really be something to look forward to and even my wait in the Doctor's office will be a lot more tolerable!! So, from about 20 years to a prospective window of 60 years it can only get better. Maybe that's why there are so many dirty old men around?

So, if you ladies are accompanied by your husband the next time you go into town to buy groceries and he says he wants to go check out the magazine section...now you know what he's really up to!! I can't speak for the opposite sex here so, for all I know, the view out there is wideing for them as well, even though they'll probably never admit it!!

[Hi_Ho_Sliver]

And how do you spell "dirty ol' man?" LOL I get visions of Arte Johnson on laughin going after geez, whats her name, the one with the hairnet lol ..Ruth Bussey!

[Joy]

Once you reach 50, if you wake up in the morning and nothing hurts......you're dead!!!!!
Joy

[carver6]

Careful Dave!!! You're really showin' your age.
Garon

[Hi_Ho_Sliver]

Originally Posted by carver6

Careful Dave!!! You're really showin' your age.
Garon

wulll thats jist whut people toll me, aint be knowing fer shure!

[whitecree]

Maybe you just keep running into the wrong bunch of 75 year olds.

I'm still a young puppy (just getting into my 50s) but I'm already practicing for when I'm 75. People ask how I'm doing? I reply "Well, I woke up breathing..."

[Eddy Smiles]

I once had a boss who after asking, "How you doin'?" , and after receiving a long winded verbal dissertation on various bodily ailments, would sternly reply, "That was a greeting, not a question!"

"Time is carving you" ~ Master Po, Kung Fu, Episode 23

[Burnurcomputer]

When I was little my parents had this record (yes, a REAL record!!!) of a country song. It was really funny- I don't know the title but it goes a little something like this

(toot,toot) So you think you got troubles? The more you try the worse you get! So you think the world don't like you? Well brother you ain't heard nothin yet...... Well my car sounds like an old tin can, my wife ran off with another man, I sprained a muscle in my fishin' hand, my income tax is due! My doctor told me not to smoke, drink nothin' stronger then a coke, i'm not even supposed to hear dirty jokes ,for I'll laugh and sprain my heart. I've had every ailment known to man, from the African mumps to the dish pan hand, lost every race I ever ran, didn't even get a start! (toot,toot) then a repeat of the So, you think you got troubles chorus


I just wanted to share. If any one knows this song and where I can get it, let me know!

[dart]

Hmmm??? I forgot what I was going to say? Oh, I am fine. But I have a few problems...memory, athritis, vision, etc. I always say I am fine then ask the peron asking me if they want me to tell them the truth.